09/29/2009

Warring Hummels and other non sequiturs

Ebay goes to war
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I've been selling stuff on ebay ... It's neither fun nor rewarding. Some things you have to guess their value, making it a risky endeavour. Don't bother thinking that you can see what comparable items are selling for, of course I do that.
 
The part I enjoy is taking pictures and describing stuff. I'd like to say about some stuff..."Here's some real crap," for instance, figurines of babies or dogs. What am I doing with that junk anyway? Oh. I like the receiving money part too.
 
It's all part of my bigger effort to rid my life of unnecessary baggage.. If' I live long enough to completely shed my outer layer of accumulation, I'll considerate my life a life well lived but I'm going up against a long tradition. My mother loved her junk too. She'd sit in her living room, read romance novels and cover everything with a fine patina of nicotine. If you ever have to detoxify similarly covered candy dishes, wall hangings of anything that won't wilt or dissolve, I highly recommend cleaning them in an ammonia solution, Clorox won't touch it.
 
Some things are useless from the moment they're conciewved. What did George Carlin say? "My shit's stuff while your stuff's shit?" Oh, but I miss the man.
 
Maybe we could hold proxy wars. Round up the nation's useless Home Interior stuff, Avon stuff, and stuff of no particular distinction, and place them in a battle field. We could make it a patriotic gesture, like giving up rubber and silk during the big one. Then, after every nation is in, have a world wide seek and destroy mission. Whoever suffers the least casualties to their junk wins that round. No Bunker Busters or Nukes, in fact we'd have to mime hand to hand combat like kids playing with action figure.
 
When it's over, the winner qualifies for preferred treatment from the IMF and the World bank znd  Knick Knack production begins anew. We cold have corporate sponsors pay for the mock melees and travel expenses. We could sell commemorative regalia. Entire evens could be televised and the enemy can always shout, "New guy" and redeem himself as a hummel.     Gene
Hummel.jpg

09/26/2009

Cats

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If I was a cat everything would be cool, I'd have no worries, no "situations" no money problems, nothing.
 
Oh, I'd still be vulnerable to disease and other negativities and seeing a large, looming, kick-ass stray cat would probably scare the shit out of me but these are things that I've endured, in one way or another, as a human as well.
 
The difference is cats never worry themselves sick, oh wait, there are neurotic house cats and if there can be neurotic house cats why shouldn't there be neurotic feral cats too? Imagine a young Woody Allen cat, or a supremely insecure Richard Lewis cat, who, by the way, had a short lived TV sit-com starring Jamie lLee Curtis. The series was ruined, the whole premise destroyed once they had sex. The show was built around the sexual tension existing between the two characters and... but I digress.
 
Oh the other hand, in the wild could a Woody Allen cat even evolve? There are bound to be aberrations in every species but maybe the duality of a cat neurosis has a survival benefit; who would ever take in an unrepentant killer cat, love and feed it?
 
It's quite reasonable to assume that the world is filled with Woody Allen cats, cats seeking redemption, for their murderous ways while suffering the guilt of being who they are. Think Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde, where the mild mannered Dr. Jekyll eventually gives way to Mr Hyde's insidious, criminal tendencies. Cats fighting their inner demons without so much as a comfortable philosophy to assuage them.
 
I don't want to be a cat after all. It wouldn't be cool, I'd have too many worries, and situational problems. As for the money ... Woody Allen and Richard Lewis cats have both done well for themselves and the venerable Mr, Hyde stills kills for the sheer pleasure.   Gene

09/24/2009

Choir of small insects

Two black men and a bug man, 

It seems that everyone has something to say. People with no more oratory skill, or knowledge than Sarah Palin are given a world stage to pontificate on things far beyond their ken. Worst still, credentials have been replaced by notoriety: *Tom Delay, **Ken Blackwell and ***Alan Keyes come to mind but the choices are endless and the nation's premier nut house (Washington) is rife with choices.

Like a cricket's stridulation we are incessantly beaming our noises into the ether, but, while Crickets have their "ears" located on the knees of their front legs, we have our heads up our asses., probably accounting for the shitty discourse that passes for normal today. And let us not forget that the most beautiful array of Peacock feathers emanate from his anus.

All this is to say that our sometimes beautiful, floral speeches are as much meant to attract as our outraged screeds are to repel. Although we wish words alone could do the trick, it isn't that easy, words, in no way, necessarily define our thoughts or positions.

What does define our ethos, logos and pathos then? Just like momma used to say, "Our actions speak louder than our words." It's our actions that matter, call it what you will, but our refusal to be civil and moral, check that, a refusal to do what's required of us to be upright human beings, we fail to florish, and while branding it as good policy, it is as selfish and thoughtless as it is expedient and in most situations, ruthlessly discharged.

Man's default position is to be always be stuck in a decreasingly spacious box. Some start off in large boxes and some in small ones. To push back has limited value. Like Obama and his people we can hope to not lose more ground, or, like Alexander the Great we can cut the Gordian knot that ties us to our potential fate and in one decisive, bold stroke free ourselves from the bonds that hold us powerless . . Gene

*In 2005, a Texas grand jury indicted DeLay on criminal charges that he had conspired to violate campaign finance laws during that period. DeLay denied the charges and pled not guilty, saying they were politically motivated and the law he was indicted under did not apply until later,

**Ohio voters sued Blackwell on August 31, 2006 in a case called King Lincoln Bronzeville Neighborhood Association v. Blackwell in which individual voters and three voters' rights groups alleged that, in his capacity as Secretary of State, Blackwell "allocated [2004] election resources in a racially discriminatory manner and instituted racially discriminatory procedures for provisional voting, purging voters from the statewide voter registration database, and maintaining the chain of custody of ballots. The complaint alleged that these actions led to the dilution and/or cancellation of plaintiffs' vote due to ballot cancellation and tampering, long poll lines, mechanical difficulties with voting machines, and unclear precinct boundaries." The complaint claims that plaintiffs reasonably feared these problems would recur in the November, 2006, election, and asked the court to appoint a special master to perform Blackwell's election administration duties in that election.

This is the same Ken Blackwell that wrote, criticizing ACORN:

As negotiations over Congress’s emergency rescue bill continued over the weekend, repeated rumors leaked out that the Democrats were trying to funnel money to a hyper-partisan organization involved in criminal voter fraud. I’m speaking of the Association of Community Organizations for Reform Now — known by its acronym, ACORN. Although ACORN was cut from the final legislation, it’s important to understand this organization and its long history with, of all people, Barack Obama. And it’s important to see how partisan this emergency legislation has become.

***Goofy black bastard:

 

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